Reflection On Modern Life Gifts

"You could say he died rich. He had 10,000 friends on Facebook."

'Do you remember when our time away from the office was our time...'

THE PIED PIPER OF GRAMERCY PARK

"Could you go back to the front desk? The receptionist has some forms for you to fill out."

"My online account predicts the things I should own, then buys them with my credit card. It�s very convenient, but I do now need to move to a larger house."

"Who's taking my order—the committee of the whole, or is there a liaison for decaf?"

"Would you like to keep eighty-seven tabs open?"

#Whyneighborsdon'tknowtheirneighbors

'I can't wait 'til hunting is googling and gathering is calling out for delivery.'

Crap from the future.

"Do you want to be vaguely dissatisfied with Italian or Korean?"

Snoopy with Laptop

The prophet who changed water into diet grapefruit soda.

"Here's something called "The Fifty Greatest Countdown Shows Ever!""

"Listen to this: 'Technology reduces the time we spend on a given task, but increases the number of tasks we're expected to do.' Sounds like a no-win situation to me!"

"Hang on. Mommy's just checking to see if she's still relevant to the outside world."

"Day 4,261... I don’t know how much longer I can survive. Still no signs of civilization. Food is scarce and I fear the wound on my ankle is infected. Still, all this pales in comparison to the horror of having to be anywhere at any particular time."

"Did you get my tweet?"

"I feel like pushing the envelope this morning, honey, starting with a little grape jelly for that bran muffin."

Super Strength, Impervious to Bullets And Explosions

"I cancelled the cable, turned off the phone, shut down the internet. . . where the hell am I??"

"Nature speaks to me of God’s presence, yet God is a total stranger to the restless world of men." "Why the #!@* is there no signal?!"

Weird things I do because of the internet

The Modern Novel.

"More quarters! For God's sake, more quarters!!"

'Hurray for indoor plumbing!'

"Freshly ground pepper?"

"You haven't enjoyed the Yule log till you've enjoyed it in high def."

Fleeting illusions of happiness hour 5-7

'Thanks for the book, dad. Now I can reach my computer!'

"She married and then divorced, and then she married and divorced, and then she married and lived happily ever after."

Fur Baby

'This is suppose to be progress.'

Happiness is spending late summer afternoon on a buying binge at the iPhone app store.

Tunnel of TV