Recovery Realist Pillows

"You say that the best thing I could do for my health is to give up alcohol. Let's talk about the second best..."

"It's all very well being healed, but that mobility scooter cost a fortune."

"The good news is you’re the only one we’re not firing ... the bad news is you’re the only one to run the department."

World Production.

"This is the World Bank? Somehow, I had pictured it differently."

"Son, the world is full of disappointments. About 7.7 billion of them."

Depressed Businessman at Office Christmas Party.

"You can't offend me. I never mix religion or politics with reality."

COVID Devotion

'Could I have a doggie bag?'

Recession

"Have you ever given any thought to what you're going to do after all your hopes and dreams are crushed?"

'Well, that's simplified the mission statement.'

Great moments in science. . . 'Nice work, you've isolated the funding gene.'

"Well, you could wish for a new kitchen and a bathroom renovation; or alternatively you could just wish for a less idle husband."

"It's my 30-day chip. One month catnip free."

US Dollar weakens.

'Our retirement program is that you can resign whenever you want to.'

"I'm the ghost of your future retirement."

Retirement Issues

"Goodbye cruel world."

He was out in no time, with a new outlook and a clean slate.

Squeezing a tight budget...

'This is how our new no-risk pension scheme works.'

'They had a sale on electric green.'

'I re-invested what was left of my 401K into returnable pop cans. I figure by the time I retire I should have about three dollars.'

"Didn't we have a door over there?"

Working in recovery of Hurricane

'The bad news is that the dollar is down -- the good news is that nobody seems to have any.'

"Who would have thought retirement would be this much fun."

'Management doesn't think we have a staffing problem...Apparently all we need to do is to use our imagination.'

'Look at my new overdraft its fantastic.'

Physiotherapist tells Humpty Dumpty: 'OK, you've had a great fall, but we'll have you back on that wall in no time.'

'That's not in addition to your pension, that IS your pension.'

"Fourteen months ago, I started with H20. I just ended with H20."