Recovery Anniversary Gifts

Alcoholics Anonymous

'I really enjoyed my stay in the hospital - I never get served breakfast in bed at home.'

"Our war is against cancer."

"Things are still a little rough for me, and occasionally I lose hope and get depressed—but I'm getting stronger every day."

Spa

"Actually, I'm still on life support. I just came by to do a feasibility study."

Vlad the Inhaler

'Believe me, Mr, Hart, Laughter really is the best medicine,'

Self-esteem room

'Okay, Mom. I'm sorry I re-gifted one of the kidneys you gave me.'

"He's going to be O.K., but he still wants you to remarry."

'Your master isn't due for release until the first of the month.'

Clown Cheering Up Patient.

"He should be up and complaining in no time."

As a rule, all surprise parties start out with good intentions.

"Good news! She's asking for her Banana Republic and Williams-Sonoma catalogues."

"Friends have been scribbling on my cast."

Saved...life is good!

"Yeah, my life flashed before my eyes!...OK, it was food - all the food I've ever eaten flashed before my eyes."

"I can't stay in this hospital bed too long. Everyone will think I'm too old...too fragile...ready for the home. I'm not ready for that!"

"The doctor was more lucid today! That's a good sign!"

'Your blood Sugar is very high.'

"It says you need a CT scan and that the azaleas in the corner need to be watered twice daily."

'Haven't seen you in church lately John?'

'Harvey does all his own 'get well' cards.'

'I'm sorry, Louis. I should have warned you that I installed a speed bump in front of the refrigerator.'

"I've outlived my conventional and alternative doctors."

"Call me a taxi if I start foaming at the mouth."

'Ignore them, Charlie. They're nothing but philistines. I liked your poetry, truly I did!'

'The food here isn't too bad, just try not to swallow !'

"We're doing everything we can to make him comfortable, short of dressing up as male doctors."

'It didn't hurt at all. You gave it to my teddy bear.'

'I thought it might help you get your mind off things. It's a story of hope and survival. Nothing at all like your story.'

A robot is in hospital, he has a card saying 'get welded soon.'

"Say hi to your mother for me and tell her I'm happy her bypass turned out O.K