Real Estate Reality Checker Gifts

'It's a handy household device that helps calculate your negative equity'

"This is the perfect way to watch movies if you love mosquitoes and having a cold, wet butt."

"So, the Scharfs have an atoll. Big deal."

"I'm from brokers without borders. Invest in deserted island reits!"

"Well, either you're hopelessly optimistic or hopelessly short-sighted."

Ice Cream And Summer Rentals

Staff. Manager. So then you must say "I refuse to lift weights." Hey, that's not what I expected when I hired you to be a resistance training instructor!

Skeptic: Critical Thinking, Facts, Debunking.

'Can we call a realtor now?!'

Estate Agent - This house that's 'just what we are looking for' is ours

There are dreams...And then there's reality...

"Have you ever given any thought to what you're going to do after all your hopes and dreams are crushed?"

Objects in mirror bear no relation to reality.

"It's not so much a fixer upper as a tear it downer."

'Apparently, wild hopes and dreams, re-enacted by Barbie and Ken, are no substitute for a solid business plan.'

"Fit the reality to our statistics!"

'What makes you think the basement leaks?'

Since I took command of the company, I have steered a steady course.

"Do you ever wish you lived in a different era, Randy?" "Well… every waking moment I wish I were living before the beginning of existence itself. So I could witness the Big Bang." "It's safer to keep me where I am. Injecting my advanced virility into more primitive eras could have disastrous effects on the timeline." "That way I could know for sure whether our universe is all just one big simulation running on some geek's computer." "I mean, everything being made up of atoms and math is

'If you want a reality check, I'll have to see two pieces of I. D.'

"This says you should expect to spend six months and at least $800 building the perfect lowrider bike."

Realty. Remember

"Good morning - I'm from your bank. We'd like our house back please!"

"It's a great Fixer-Upper and this is Ken, single, available and a pretty decent handyman."

"We've managed to eliminate every problem except the public perception that we're heading in the wrong direction."

"No dear- I said I was going to buy you a big PROPER TEA!"

'Yes, the walls ARE thin, but you'll be happy to know a world-famous rapper lives in the next unit.'

"I believe you were complaining about your cold this morning."

'Yeah? Well... bite me! No... wait!'

"Starting at a new agency can be overwhelming. Let me show you around."

Home 'Submerged' Home! (Home value less than mortgage).

Psychiatrist. She said she could help get me in touch with reality or boost my self-esteem but not both.

"You can make your life any way you want it. Don't let your thoughts limit your future. It is possible to achieve your dreams!"

'Perhaps you've been 'lovin it' a bit too much?'

"Admittedly, it is a bit of a 'fixer upper'."