Real Estate Punsters Gifts

Moving. Mortgage payments bankrupted them. I guess "housebroken" means something different in their case.

'And if you look to your left between the condos and the ABD store, you can see the ocean.'

Do you mind if we stop calling this a "starter house" now?

"Some day, son, all this will be your ex-wife's."

"Aren't you the estate agent who sold us this house?"

'For Sale by Neighbor'

The Contrarian funds

'Honey, it's the escrow people. They want to know if you could send a stool sample.'

'Gee! You must have lost some on this property!'

An exaggeration of estate agents

Mouse real estate!

House hunting is cruel.

'I see you've renamed your portfolios Moe, Larry and Curley.'

"It's one of the positive side effects of the new weight-loss drugs."

Ask Mister Buck: Financial Expert. "Dear Mister Buck, Is it true that 'money talks'?" Yes, and it drowns out everything else!

"I told you we should have sold last winter."

'I think you'll all rest easy knowing this is a gated community!'

'Give it to me straight, Doc - just how long-term should my long-term investments be?'

'If straw and sticks don't appeal, I do have something in brick that might interest you.'

"The house is great, but compared to reality show realtors, you're a big disappointment."

'I need three estimates before I appoint an estate agent.' - 'Right, £120,000, £130,000 and £140,000.'

"For sale £470,000 house included"

'Here's the 2 acres of beachfront property you bought - too bad it's only six inches wide.'

"No pressure, but I do have another couple who are very interested."

'There's been no confirmation, but the possible merger of two giants has sent stock prices soaring.'

'Thank God I don't live in a Jimmy Choo!'

'The previous owner broke his leash ...I mean, lease.'

"It's a bit of a fixer-upper."

'One might say the market's gone from the sub-prime to the iniquitous!'

'My expedition confirmed what we already suspected: Two-thirds of the Earth's surface is covered by water, and the rest by real estate!'

"Grandma is included in the purchase price."

Real Estate Life

'A new concept. The inside out house.'

'Like I said - this property is only a stone's throw from the ocean!'

Real Estate Crispy Flakes: Location/Location/ Location