Real Estate Aficionado Gifts

"That's the deal for Manhattan. If you have to ask how much for the Hamptons, you can't afford it."

"It's your real-estate agent. She says she may have found you a higher ledge."

"Obviously the price of this property is a reflection of it`s very desirable location."

Man in house with no roof on phone to estate agent: "Look, this house is unfinished. Please stop saying, 'It gets a lot of light'."

Goldfish in Bowl, "And this is the sitting room and the bedroom and the toilet and...."

'But on the bright side, house prices are going down.'

"Okay, your story checks out. You're not a Peeping Tom, you're just a creepy real estate appraiser."

For sale sign: 'Unique 16th Century cottage. Similar properties wanted.'

"It's nice, but does it have a batcave?"

'I'm sure that one wasn't there last week.'

'Let's sell the house and move into your tax shelter.'

'The owner plays in the NBA.'

'Are you sure there wasn't a moat in the catalogue?'

Picture book

'Twenty bucks for a Manhattan! They bought the whole Island for twenty - four!'

'Your Ad mentioned, 'close to transport'.'

Estate Agent Office

'As you can taste for yourself, this property has a very rich soil...'

'Home building' going through the roof

'Stay alert. It could be a mortgage time bomb!'

'I'm a homing-pigeon you see, but since I've invested in the property market, I'm confused as to which home to return to...'

Tiny house. 'It looked a lot bigger in the photos.'

Wiffle Tree Condos.

House Hunters

'Can't afford a Second Home.'

"Wait until you see the view from the den!"

"If this is a bit beyond your budget then I've got a shoebox coming available next week!"

"Penthouse duplex, East Sixties, three bedrooms, two baths, solarium, sauna, two thousand square feet, terrace, bird feeder, two and a half million."

"This spectacular 40 room property has majestic views of the valley and village and it was tastefully renovated after the most recent Viking incursion."

"Your house-wine seems very expensive."

"I'm afraid your budget won't stretch to four bedrooms and a garden, would you consider one bedroom with a shared bathroom and access to a communal alley?"

The government is warned it is unlikely to meet at 300,000 houses per year target.

Roder got a new lease on life. At a slightly higher rate.

"This room is always bathed in the most beautiful sunlight. Except at night of course."

'I think you'll like this home, Mr. Sparky. It's got the kind of carpet that is great for butt scooting.'