Reading Tales Gifts

"He was going to buy. Why'd you tell him it was made with real gingerbread?"

"Boil, toil and trouble, I wish I'd never started this risotto."

The Fourth Little Pig

Where are they now?: Office of Management & Budget - Grumpy.

',,, and if anyone knows of a reason why these two should not be married, let them storm this castle with pitchforks and torches or forever hold their peace,'

Church Library - Pop-Up Books

"Hang on, isn't this the second pair of zebras we've had today?"

'I don't care what the blueprints say, I'm certain HE strongly suggested a roof.'

'Ignore it! It's just some of the local kids trying to get in for free.'

'Hey, Baby! How would you like to kiss the frog formerly known as 'Prince'?'

Aladdin's Less Magic Carpet Ride.

',,,And we'd really like a heart for the Tin Man,,,'

'I'm going to have to cut it - Daddy is complaining about the shampoo bill again.'

Alice Through the Looking Glass - Alice Climbs Through The Mirror.

Three little pigs-mortgage.

Snow White and her husband go for counselling.

Witches Checkout.

"Never mind the porridge, someone's stolen my woodland mushroom collection."

"These are magic beans, my boy. Their value comes from growth and scale, not revenue."

Beauty and the Baste

The hare and the tortoise - the rematch.

My, grandma, what a big premium you have for a plan that doesn't cover getting eaten by a wolf.

Goldilocks and the three boyfriends.

Good boy

'Thanks to the internet, I can telecommute a few days a week now: I don't need to waste so much time travelling...'

Rapunzel's short-lived career in the restaurant business.

'Notice the nice safety feature...crash-proof bumpers!'

"After the big race, the tortoise and the hare are ordered to provide urine samples."

Goldilocks Investments: Too hot...too cold...just right.

"Boss, can you check the address again? I have a bad feeling about this one."

Let's all be fairies.

"There's nothing like new carpeting to freshen up a place, I say."

"Same hectic routine every damn year. Mind if I hang back with you?"

Giant Headless Horseman

Every time I get a postcard from your brother, I regret that I carved him out of driftwood.