Reading Humorous Comics Gifts

"Maureen, Phelps is down. Would you like to come In and kick him?"

"Come in, she's through there."

"See? I told you changing his food would be traumatizing."

'Fetch.'

"Yo, Eunice – don’t leave me hangin’."

Billy. The Kid.

'Look around, son. See if there's one you like. But remember: These are abandoned players, unwanted by their teams - so they might come with some psychological baggage.'

"It says: 'The teamwork that got you here is the real treasure.' Aww."

"The Hound of the Baskervilles, Watson--I took him walkies!"

"Dear Wendy, please excuse the tardiness of my response to your recent tweet from Hoboken."

"Been following me around all morning. I think it's the new intern."

'It's good to be here. We're having economic problems where we come from.'

'Mom, don't you understand? Those collars are symbols of subservience and repression!'

'If you want to live a long time, try not to do anything that will kill you.'

"They're friendly, but they're also carnivorous, so remember that when you're called on to beg and roll over."

'Satchel, I have just had a revelation.'

What's that? - 'It's a mosquito bite.' - 'Scratch it!' - 'No, I need to buy some cream.' - 'Make it bleed!!!' - 'Gahhh!!!' -

Bill and Lester have a 'Hay Day'.

"So what makes you think you're qualified for this job?"

'You realize, of course, there's a seven-day waiting period.'

'There's nothing wrong with your heart. It's your soft chocolate center.'

'I think it's about time we tell him he's adopted.'

"Look, it's my word balloon."

BEWARE OF THE DOG!; 'So much for management's pledge to bargain in good faith.'

'In the computer simulation he said he admired my candor and gave me a raise.'

"Doctor - at home I get this nagging pain... what do you recommend?"

Bulltoon: Certifiabull

Babies.

"Peach fuzz. How does a nectarine know when it reaches puberty?"

"So how did the rest of the team respond to your promotion?"

Trainer: I'll warn you now Johnny, don't underestimate this guy. If he gets you into a corner, he'll clean you up.

Shipwrecked man on desert island with tyre tracks on sand.