Rancher Gifts

"This is the life eh.?"

"Next Christmas, I drive the cattle, you go see Mom."

"No one is making you do anything you don't want. I'm just saying we're all headed for Dodge City and we think you should come along."

"All hat and no cattle but, my god, what a hat."

'Pay back time on the ranch'

"Oh God, yes! I've been a bad cow! Such a bad, naughty cow! Again! Yes!"

YOUR HORSE - Poster style outlining horse parts.

"I don't care if it's plant-based, you're creeping everyone out."

"For economy of scale I'm thinking we should drive two cows to dodge city.''

THe UDDER Side

'You fellas know what the code of the west is? I need it to get online.'

Don't laugh. Meat and milk production is up 50%.

"First we get a bunch of cows."

'Hey partner, you're building your brand with stolen content.'

'I don't know about you, Clyde, but I'm getting a mighty uneasy feeling we could be riding straight into an ambush interview!'

'You know, Doc, we always do our own dehornin' and castratin' here, but we thought we'd give you a chance this time.'

"At this time, we would like to welcome all platinum priority members to board."

'Lord, we thank thee for the bounty we're about to receive.'

"I'm coming - I just need some 'me' time."

'Down a few volts yet Harry!'

Tattoo removal - cow has 'Eldorado rance' on his backside.

"I've decided to replace the sod floor with tile."

Cowboy philosophy.

'You wanted a home where the buffalo roam...'

"Sometimes, son, the guilt inside builds up so much you have to vent the shame silo."

"You're going to have to do something about your vehicle's emissions."

Father & Son Bulls

The world's first riding lawn mower.

"Yippee - I - O. Over?"

'I love herd mentality, don't you?'

'He's at that tender age between veal and filet mignon.'

Damn!

Reversibull: 'Well this is awkward.'

''E's going for the 'double'!'

Bumper Stickers on a Cowboy's Horse