Racehorse Trainer Gifts

"Retirement is great, and I don't miss the races really: I do miss the roar of the crowd though..."

'Not bad, 3mn 30s, but you still need to do much better than that...'

'I actually make a lot more money as a bookmaker than I ever did as a race horse...'

'At a glnace, I'd say you've got a dodgy starter.'

'Look at'em... They're HUGE.'

"That's right, at the height of my racing career, I spent a lot of time abroad, but really, mist of it was at quarantine stations before the races..."

Panto Horse at the Races

Jump for joy. It's Christmas.

"Me, I've quit racing. I was very good at it, but I just couldn't hack the early training sessions..."

'I was betting you wouldn't show.'

'Look at'em... They're HUGE.'

Clancy: Replay

"Out of Chicago Lady by Pistol Whipped owner A.Capone..."

'My dad says school is a waste of time and that as long as I'm fast, I'll succeed...'

'Presenting the award for the most improved horse of the year....'

'Did my horse win?' - 'No, he failed the drug test.'

'Personally, I don't like to play Fetch, but it makes him happy.'

Skipping Horse

"You do realize you can't take that one home."

"Quick, start the car!"

Braiding a Horse's Tail

The Victors

Little girl dangling from her horse track.

"Yeah, he's cute but don't approach him. He's a service human."

'Every night it's the same - always my turn to put the Bally Cat out!'

"Cross-breeding oops #1." "The Cougadooodle"

"What I'd give for a stimulating conversation..."

For speedy operation and ease of control get a pony.

Litter Tray Training

'He's not supposed to go out.'

Riding School Chaos

"Give him time, - if anyone can break that swing set, it's O'l Tex."

"And the winner is… Dan the Man by a nose!"

Funky Facts: Monkeys.

'Listen Sonny, I don't want or NEED to get to the other side!'