Racecourse Rangers Gifts

'Maybe you're sitting on the wrong end.'

-Sorry about yesterday, I was ill! -You didn't look ill when I saw you at the races! -You didn't see me after the fifth leg!

Disraeli's Reform Bill Passes the Committee Stage

Run, Mike, Run!

'I like the look of that Trojan Boy.'

'On your mark, get set...'

'Pull it over, Speedy.'

'Lost again. I hope you kept a diary of your trip.'

The steeple-chase. Man reads a sign stating that no horseman is allowed to follow the racehorses over the course.

'Your wife borrowed the car.'

'So you've won a few races: I still don't think you need worry about the paparazzi!'

'I'd bet that with that race engine, you could beat anybody to the neighborhood grocery store.'

Cheapskate b*****d told me he'd laid on a box for me to watch the races.

Competitive Horse at the Racetracks.

"...and those are cheese and cucumber..."

"On your mark, get set, go!"

'What's this?' - 'Your sealed orders, not to be opened till 7 furlongs.'

Professional runners chasing money

"The last one to The Four Seasons picks up the check."

'Remember the plan: on the final stretch, you go down.'

"That settles it, John! We're getting this bike a tune-up!"

Man with 'starter pistol' mugs runners.

'It gives me great pleasure in presenting you with the jockey of the year award.'

Clancy:Breaking Even at the Races

"I like the look of this steamer in the 2.30."

-You seem certain he'll win the second race! -Yes, because he's in the FIRST race!

-Last again! -I had to stay behind the others because I didn't know the way!

'Come on, let me win today: It's my jockey's birthday!'

'This should be interesting.'

Monday Hurdle

The Tour de Pants.

It's an anti-tipping device, I thought of it while watching Drag-Racing on TV...