Race Day Joker Pillows

'Your shoe's untied.'

Banana Split...

'Which one of you told Glurk to stretch before running?'

A Snowman falls down drunk outside a bar.

Jogging Bottoms

"I'm thinking about letting myself get old."

'Geez, I hate these fun runs!'

'... and finally, before tip-off, let's all be courteous and turn off our cell phones.'

'I've met you before...I'm not good with names, but I never forget a pace!'

'The doctor is running a little late this morning; but a couple more laps around the park and he should be back at his desk.'

Snowman Driver

"I've been telling everyone how athletic you are."

"You idiots … we lost!"

'There are two types of cholesterol - the good type, then the one you've got.'

False encouragement.

'Ptuwah! This is tap water!'

AL'S GYM, 'We're going to make a new man of you!' 'Will he have new credit cards?'

"Uh ho. It looks like the Ref's giving him the yellow vuvuzela."

Running With Scissors Marathon

'It's no use ... I'll never catch anyone. I can't even catch my breath.'

Tred carefully mill.

'I plucked myself. It reduces drag in the water.'

Two men are jogging. One is noticing 'Danger Wide Load' sign on back of other.

'Runners to your mark. Get set... wait! Lane three! Turn sideways!'

"Hi, Mum, I'm last in the race, but I do have the best mobile."

Caution: Jogger Makes Frequent Bathroom Stops

"My exercise routine appears to be working as long as I hang around fat people."

'Spinout!'

"The last one to The Four Seasons picks up the check."

Just for laughs, let's throw a few folks off course.

Professor Axxis feels naked jogging without his toupee.