Rabbit Raconteur Gifts

'Ok, ok. We'll run through it one more time. The rabbit pops up, goes round the tree ..'

Ernie Studios. Hi, Ernie. What movies are you working on? We have a script about astronauts marooned on a planet filed with talking gorillas who are in hard economic times. I think I'll call it "The Apes of Wrath"! We're casting "Reignman." The central character is a savant monarch. And we're filming a movie about a suburban town populated by women with strange, long hair ... It's called "The Stepford Weaves."

'Oh no, it's the Burkes! You stall them here while I go fix my hair and don't let them roam around. Remember, once you have cockroaches in your kitchen, you'll never get rid of them.'

'Iguana know what time it is.'

"I have a couple of other projects I'm excited about."

Non Thought For The Day.

'No.... My cat doesn't like being given pills either...'

"Yes, but you were the defender of the wrong faith."

Coffee Shop and Battery Charging Station

I'm a gangster rap fan too!

"Why do people talk about a rat's nest like it's a bad thing?"

'As a young rat, I traveled the world as a stowaway on a merchant navy ship...'

"I've been having hallucinations again, Doctor."

Yes, the salad was vegan. In fact, we even offered it first to all the bunnies in the area, each of whom insisted that, no, he was quite full, and he'd like you to have it.

'I feel better today too, but around here I've learned not to be too optimistic.'

There is no limit to the amount of nonsense that men can talk about football.

How Platypuses Are Born

It Actually Happened 'My neighbour is always bragging about her Manx cat....

The world's oldest braided rug

"You misinterpreted the news. I've simply had a terrific autumn."

Robot asking for money in bar code language.

'I object, your Honor! How much wood would woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood is purely conjecture!'

Cat being guarded by security mice.

'It's a cheeky little wine!'

'Down on the farm!'

'When did I first start rambling? Well, it's a long story...'

Businessman As A Weather Vane

"My grant is somewhat restrictive. I have to work only with even numbers."

'Suspence, intrigue, deceit, vice...the annual report.'

Prince Charles celebrates Queen's abdication.

"What's that welt, Gracie?"

'Well yes there was life before television but it didn't amount to much. . .'

'...And before I knew it, I'd delegated ALL my authority!'

"And now, our motivational squeaker."

In their secret campaign to enslave humanity, the machines make their first big misstep with Artificial Sincerity.