Quotable Kid Gifts

"Okay, quote me. I'm on the record."

My First Camera

"Abstract Expressionism is definitely right for me at this stage of my career."

'Hi, Miss Henderson, we did collage in class today. Can you drive me home?'

Jr. cloning kit

"Isn't it an amazing co-incidence that this is an orange, and it IS ORANGE?"

"My mom says I can start a rock band if I call it 'I Love My Mommy.' You in?"

'Does sports trivia count as something I learned today?'

"It's an Eyesaur."

Feeding of a giraffe with the use of a balloon.

'All good things must come to an end.'

Philosopher trading cards.

"In school we learned about Staten Island. Is that where they make all those pills you take?"

I think he knows something that we don't know about the uranium molecule.

'You can fill your teddy bear with stuffing or with a demonic spirit summoned from the nether regions.'

"Gracie's the only kid I know who offers El Cucuy under her bed a no-compete contract."

"Since I became a creator on social media, fridge displays seem so passé."

"Naughty? Nice? It's a bit more nuanced than that..."

Abstract expressionist face painting.

'Would it make a difference if I told you I was listening to book on audio?'

'For no particular reason I want to know the location of our fire extinguisher.'

'Your stork story got me to thinking, Dad -- wouldn't it be simpler if people just did it like dogs and cats do?'

"That' a wonderful picture, sweetheart. You know, maybe we should keep all of this garbage, in case you become a famous artist."

"Timmy, your dog looks just like he does in your drawings."

"Reverend, if we're born again in Jesus...do we get another belly button?"

'As a kid I was always taking things apart...so, anyway, that's when my parents stopped getting me pets.'

"A plague of frogs? Awesome!"

'Let's see, here we have the first results from of the brain scanner...'

G.P.S. For the Home

"It was you, Jason. Dr. Karnes had it authenticated."

'We studied the multiplication table in school today -- frankly, I don't believe a word of it.'

'I got an F in arts because the dog ate my homework!'

Playing dustbins