Quitting Smoker Sense Of Humor Gifts

Man Carrying Olympic Torch Stops For Smoke Break

'They help with my nicotine patch addiction.'

'Do you mind!!?'

Smokers smoking on the moon, Astronauts smoking on the moon

"Since I've gone over to roll-ups I find I can get by on just one cigarette a day!"

'our chances seemed pretty good until you lighted that 20.'

"I'm afraid the umbrella constitutes an enclosed space and must be taken down."

"The dog wants out again!"

"I only allow myself one after a meal - I'm now down to 43 meals a day!"

'Why can't you just chew bones like other dogs?' (dog smoking pipe).

igloo smoking zone...

"That's why you don't smoke near the dang cannon!"

'Forget about going to the store for a bicycle patch. I used one of your nicotine patches.'

'Well actually, the only reason I put my head out of the window is that Master smokes while driving...'

Snowman with 'No Smoking' sign.

"He said if we don't let him in, he'll huff and he'll puff and he'll fill up our whole house with cigar smoke."

'Well the dog's been passively smoking our fags for the past ten years, so I think it's only fair that he has a nicotene patch too.'

'I used to be a pack animal. Lately, I've become a two pack animal.'

'Smoking or non-smoking?'

Punch has a smoking break.

Tim's hopes for his safer smoking device were to be dashed when it failed to fit through the door...

Grumpy man telling a teddy bear whoes watching TV to get out of his chair

Prehistoric Cigarette Lighter

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"Smoking causes cancer in humans. I'm canine."

'It's a nicotine patch: I'm trying to quit smoking...'

'Aren't we entitled to a ten minute smoking break?'

"See? Right there - it says bubblegum."

'The ones who smoke, masturbate... the ones who don't smoke, masturbate... is this a study on smoking or masturbation?'

"You should have mentioned in your resume that you could only do it once."

Signs at the entrance of a cemetery pointing to the "Smoking" and "Non-smoking" sections.

Hell's Smoking Section

Smoking and non-smoking sides of a Volcano.

If they ban smoking in cars...

'It's a filthy and nasty habit, but at least, you won't end up with yellow teeth...'