Quitters Gifts

'Do the patches help?'

'It's a nicotine patch...I've been smoking too much.'

"Its my letter of resignation. I also turned it into a memoir."

"I want to quit, spend more time with my family, finish grade 3....."

"Dear Diary... I've stopped smoking, and I'm sticking to my diet."

'This should be good. He just won the lottery!'

Trapeze artist leaves sign saying 'I quit'!

Acupuncture - "So two hundred needles stuck into my fags will help me quit smoking, will it?"

"My chronic condition has been pestering me every single day for the past six months. I'm a lifelong quitter so its persistence is troubling me."

"Can we get some more nicotine patches, pal?"

'There's something about being locked up with a 500lb gorilla, highly allergic to cigarette smoke, that works every time.'

The trouble with trying to quit smoking.

'Hi John, it's your partner, Peter. I've decided to have a non-smokers day off - it should just make up for all the cigarette breaks you've taken in the last month!'

"I want out!"

"Phil suddenly decided to give up everything that was bad for him-no more smoking, drinking, or junk food-and he feels absolutely terrific!"

'To show I'm serious about giving up smoking for new year, I'm going to sign this pledge.'

'After you stop smoking you're supposed to eat more, not drink more.'

'I'll only have one pack of nicotene patches this week. My mate's supposed to be getting me some cheaper ones from abroad.'

'If you stop smoking now, you will add three years to your life. Since you are a lawyer, that's about six thousand billable hours.'

'Are you still frustrated with the computer, dear?'

'Sorry, you can't smoke in the control group.'

"Give up? Do you realise how hard it was to start?"

"This year, I resolve to give up smoking."

Smoker's Lungs.

I'm no longer on Twitter. I ran out of interesting things to say. Now I'm on Quitter.

Man emphasizing that he has quit (colour)

'It's a nicotine patch: I'm trying to quit smoking...'

You've been so grouchy since you quit smoking.

'I'm down to five a day with this new brand!'

"Mr. Brown, my ship came in. I've decided to cruise right on out of here!"

'So, how's the anger management course going, then?'

'Thank you for welcoming us into your...'

Smoking Area

'He started smoking again because he misplaced the remote control!'

'I need a cigarette! I'm having a nicotine fit!'