Quirky Smoker Humor Gifts

"Since I've gone over to roll-ups I find I can get by on just one cigarette a day!"

'Do you mind!!?'

Smokers smoking on the moon, Astronauts smoking on the moon

'our chances seemed pretty good until you lighted that 20.'

"I'm afraid the umbrella constitutes an enclosed space and must be taken down."

'Which dog is named 'BOGART'?'

"The dog wants out again!"

'Why can't you just chew bones like other dogs?' (dog smoking pipe).

"I only allow myself one after a meal - I'm now down to 43 meals a day!"

igloo smoking zone...

"That's why you don't smoke near the dang cannon!"

'Well actually, the only reason I put my head out of the window is that Master smokes while driving...'

'If you want to smoke, you'll have to go outside.'

Snowman with 'No Smoking' sign.

'Well the dog's been passively smoking our fags for the past ten years, so I think it's only fair that he has a nicotene patch too.'

"He said if we don't let him in, he'll huff and he'll puff and he'll fill up our whole house with cigar smoke."

'Smoking or non-smoking?'

'I used to be a pack animal. Lately, I've become a two pack animal.'

"Smoking causes cancer in humans. I'm canine."

Grumpy man telling a teddy bear whoes watching TV to get out of his chair

Tim's hopes for his safer smoking device were to be dashed when it failed to fit through the door...

Prehistoric Cigarette Lighter

Cigarettes $7.50 - Ask About Our Easy Payment Plan.

''Stop smoking'? -- but my psychiatrist just told me to start!'

"We think he picked it up at the kennel."

If they ban smoking in cars...

Signs at the entrance of a cemetery pointing to the "Smoking" and "Non-smoking" sections.

Casino - featuring pre-owned cigarette smoke.

Snowman

Hell's Smoking Section

Smoking and non-smoking sides of a Volcano.

"See? Right there - it says bubblegum."

'The ones who smoke, masturbate... the ones who don't smoke, masturbate... is this a study on smoking or masturbation?'

"You should have mentioned in your resume that you could only do it once."

'I roll my own E-cigarettes."