Quirky Shrink Pillows

'I'm sensing a lot of road rage.'

'RUN FOR COVER!!!!! It's another one of those 'Baby Showers'!!!

'...when did you first get these feelings of wanting to be a psychiatrist?'

Best before 65 million BC.

Mystery Solved - Boxers or Briefs, 'Thanks but you could have just told me.'

God taking iceburgs with ice tongs for his whisky.

"How's everything here? Let's start with your earliest childhood memories."

Pest Control

'Would you like some of our house wine? I just made it.'

'I'm sure it's a violation, but I can't find it in the rule book.'

Tortoise polishing his shell

Man feeding fish banks with money, not food.

"On the weekend I finally beat the club pro...so I don't need you anymore!"

A hunchback rings bells in a gym while other guys pull weights

The Mattress Savings Bank

Shrink

I always feel so short when you wear heels.

"Slow down. This stuff is gold, I’m tellin’ ya! Gold!"

When psychiatry works too well!

Psychological Warfare Target Practice

"We have raccoons."

Make it look like an accident. Carpet cleaners.

Woman in swimsuit vacuuming the lawn.

"Okay, we got one cherry lager, with bitters and a pineapple slice, and one honey malt ale with cinnamon and an orange weist. You want these in steins or parfait glasses?"

So that's what they mean by the "vacuum of space"! Vvrrrrr. WHOOSH!

Christmas Group Therapy.

Noah falls asleep by counting animal pairs.

Where bee's wax really comes from.

Face painting vs bottom painting

'Take comfort in the knowledge that better men than you have far worse inferiority complexes.'

'My therapist says I've developed a cult of personality disorder.'

"The Scrimpshaws have finally decided to deposit their savings."

Reverse piggy bank

"At this time of the summer, I hate time."

"He's out jogging."