Shrink Aficionado Pillows

'...and what makes you think that people always take advantage of you?'

Tartine

"Thanks to the Oscars, we're going to be the hottest finger food this season."

'My body has rejected every diet I've tried.'

Rage.

He's in training for the rugby World Cup.

"I just want you to know that promotion, this office, and those Luna bars were mine!"

"I'm not eating cookies before dinner. I'm having cookies for dinner!"

'1,2,3 4,5,6 7,8,9...'It's the little things that count.(little figurines counting).

I put a picture of my lunch on Facebook, and nobody hit "like." Who doesn't like Slim Jims and beer?

Love is when you watch television together.

'Take of the fruit and eat . . . Well, peanuts actually.'

How The Sausage Is Eaten

"Funny. My girlfriend said the same thing."

Budget Bureau. Ernie, spilling something from every food group on it, does not make it a "balanced" budget!

'These hors d'oeuvres are real slop, and I mean that in the best sense.'

"We'd better stock up on TV snacks in the event of war."

'At least he isn't into drugs.'

'You'll enjoy our staff meetings. We always begin and end with the product.'

Lioness Shops for Snacks.

"Note the spike here, when the state legalized marijuana."

'I see you're still trying to get the staff enthused over the weekly meetings.' (Meeting offers free coffee, free snacks, eye-popping charts, exciting videos and free idea pads).

Medical Marijuana Dispensary / Medical Cheez Doodles Dispensary

"I see the downsizing continues."

"We serve danishes because that's just how I roll!"

"I'm you from the future! Or the past. I've completely lost track of time."

'Just look at him. The face that lunched on a thousand chips.'

'You do realise that's pot pourii?'

Sheltering in place.

Back in 5 minutes!

"Goal!"

Pope tarts.

Supermarket - World Cup Specials

"The best thing about this, is the lovely honeycomb centre."

"He's an indoor cat."