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'I'm afraid our worst suspicions have been confirmed - we found slug, snail and a trace amount of puppydog tail.'

"Oh, now you tell me!"

"We're pretty sure he falsifies the results, but he does it beautifully."

Fire Brain

"I want to keep it."

Just what is it that amoebas really want.

"Well, son, I'm proud of you. Getting your fifty centimetre swimming certificate is some achievement."

"Hello, research and development here. There seems to be a glitch in our gen modifier."

"Never mind what an amoeba eats - how does an amoeba eat.?"

"What did it say on the seed packet?"

Figures from 'Ascent of Man' diagram all do the Conga: 'Let's all fo the Conga, na-na-na-na ...'

"Welcome to Off-Off-Off Broadway."

'How's the gene-splicing going? Cloned any new hepatitis antibodies?'

"Fantastic! Do you realize what we've just stumbled upon? It's the fabled Lost Glove Compartment of the Ancient Astronauts!"

Reverse Ageing Laboratory

''Science moves but slowly, slowly, creeping on from point to point'. Tennyson.'

"I said to make a thousand CLONES."

"No son of mine is going into entomology."

"Actually, not all roses are red. Sometimes they're white as well as numerous other colours. Also I think you'll find that violets are sort of purple..."

Pavlov's Cat

Biologists often consult with microbiologists.

'That's interesting -- I seem to have discovered the gene that makes people want to become geneticists.'

The Soundness of Newton's Laws

Frankenstein egg.

"We've run all the technical stuff and found the cause of the funny sound coming from your computer."

Cloning Laboratory: 'I never thought I'd work here.'

Galileo's Attempt to discover is heavier dog falls faster than lighter dog.

'I'm left brained and I needed some right brains.'

No other lab did as cutting edge research using lab rats as test subjects as McWit Lab.

"Now don't expect any miracles. I'm only a para-scientist."

'He's making tremendous progress. last week he had three tails.'

'This cork idea of yours is great! How do you get it out?'

'Kleinzweck has a theory that the strong nuclear force is actually tiny rolls of duct tape.'

Carl Wilhelm Scheele: "There was a great display of ores and minerals...I could not write with a molybdenite pencil."

Ted enjoyed going to the park and feeding the woodpeckers.