Quirky Phone Call Enthusiast Gifts

Snobscene phone call

'Mr. Coleman is on vacation. Would you care to hold?'

'The King of what?'

Mobile phones and long distance relationships,

'Telephone call for Mr. Right!'

'It's the bank again... What I'd give for a bit of good old-fashioned heavy breathing!'

...the onion rings

'... Press 7 to admit defeat...'

". . . But, hey, man, I just want to say this in all sincerity, man, that you are the greatest, man, you the el numero uno cat in my book, man you. . ."

'I'll be late for dinner - a shelf fell on me.'

'I'm about to have a tantrum. What are you doing?'

'Please hold for an eternity...'

"No, you hang up first. No, you!"

"Yes, I'm still on hold and counting the billable minutes."

"Hello, Braque? Picasso here. Cubism is out."

Robinson Crusoe on the phone - "Big job. No problem, it'll be done by Friday."

Listenin' in

Collar I.D.

Business executive has desk sign stating: I am in a meeting.

Phone Calls As a Child and As an Adult

"He wants to know if I'm alone."

"I've been talking on this phone so much, I'm getting cauliflower ears."

"Thank you for holding, your prayers have advanced in the queue and will be answered by the next available deity."

Woman on the phone while her kids cause chaos in the background.

Telemarketing Center: Help wanted. It's not a job - it's a calling.

"One moment, please, while I put you on character building hold."

'You can't put me on hold... I'm putting you on hold!'

Dog Chatlines...

"May I put you on hold? I was on another line."

'Still 10 minutes to go before my cheap call rate kicks in...!'

"Hello. This is the old man across the street. Get off my lawn!"

Turkey Hotline

'I'm just opening him now. Stand by and I will give you a detailed description of what I find inside your husband...uh...hello?'

"You're currently talking to a Millennial, please hold while we try and find someone who speaks 'boomer'."

'I absolutely concur with your opinion: that I am an over scripted, brain dead moron, who is wasting your time!'