Quirky Perfectionist Gifts

"Nobody's perfect, but we're working on it."

"They say it takes 10,000 hours to perfect something- I guess I was a bit hasty throwing that together in 144."

'Why didn't he take 8 days and finish the job properly?'

"Various entrances to the gates of Hell."

"My mom's restricting my phone. She says I don't have enough Selfie Control."

"Hmmm, this might just be not funny enough for The New Yorker."

"I've heard of being organized, but isn't this a little obsessive compulsive?"

"Queen begins with Q, it should be precisely here."

"Why not pay someone to clean out the gutters?" "Total waste of good beer money." And just like that, Gail became a widow.

Perfection

"Dad, did you know Tia Carmen got a job at my school cafeteria?"

"It says it's the vodka that's distilled twenty-nine times - they just can't seem to get it right."

Hello, Mr. and Mrs. Sebum! I think you'll love this property on the left side of the chin. It's a wonderful place to start a pimple."

"Being happy with one's work is the kiss of death."

'I'm a narcissist? - Are you saying I'm not perfect?'

"You're welcome."

"I can be perfect for only one hour a day."

Desk trays - 'Do it' and 'Do it right this time'.

Social lens of the photojournalist

"Now you can send it."

Woman trying to straighten a picture of the Leaning Tower of Pisa.

"Come on, we're late. Your crosshatching looks fine."

"He hasn't the heart to discharge her. She's been with him for years."

"And on the eighth day, the Lord just puttered around..." "That cloud doesn't belong there. Did I do that? I'd better move it..."

Decorating a column.

"Dang it, my eyes were closed - take another one!"

"Don't make me look fat!"

Mount Everest.

Desk Bins: Do Over/Do Over Again/Closer, but Re-Do/Return to Top Bin.

'Look, Virginia, I'm sorry your perm didn't turn out, but there's no way I can dictate a letter while you have that bag on your head.'

"Our standards are so high we only hire people who do crossword puzzles in ink."

"It's no use. We just can't improve on perfection."

'According to today's boxscore, Rockley, you've made a couple of errors and you didn't score any runs.'

Sculptor's Attempts At Sculpting Crumpled Paper Ball End Up In Trash