Quirky Novelty Seeker T-Shirts

"Excuse me, have you got this in giant clam?"

'Would you have anything with that design in a tubetop?'

"Either that's Marmaduke with a lizard's head in front of us, or I really mixed up my meds."

"The following programme contains scenes of a very noisy vacuum cleaner."

God putting the finishing touches to the Pug.

Bar snacks served in bird-feeders.

All bets are off as Round One begins in the "Dollars versus Donuts" World Championship title fight.

Hay Rides $10

E-vac-u-ate! E-vac-u-ate! . . . I've just farted. . ."

Ball as water-melon.

wattle covers

A watch face with Stonehenge

Family members!

'It's another corporate lawyer...do we want to buy a soul?'

Picks your own strawberries....Strangle your own turkeys

'Tell me this - did you have this condition before you sat in the jacuzzi for 100 million years?'

Mayhem, Inc. Part 15

"Static cling."

Where Deviled Eggs come from

Customer entering bank that is touting number of toasters given away

Unicorn Working From Home

"Waiter, this is the worst meal I've ever tasted. And believe me, I've eaten some crap!"

'It's the pink spot, Jim lad - them rascals is going to try and tweak my nipples!'

"You like long walks in electrical storms too? Wow! We get a charge out of the same things."

Musuem. Galileo did an experiment by dropping cannonballs from the Tower of Pisa. I wonder what he discovered? Personal injury lawsuits!

Santa's Helpers

"Roadkill cookies"

"Pass that."

'Goodness, the potholes are deep this year, aren't they?'

Regifts of the Magi

International House of Excrement

'If you're out and about today don't forget the pith helmet.'

'Hey! You're not for real, are you man?'

Drinking Companions

Notorious gangsters, Bunny and Clyde.