Quirky Gift Seeker T-Shirts

"Pass that."

"Of course you feel great. These things are loaded with antidepressants."

Mimosa's Witnesses

As a Haggis has one leg longer than the other, it was often thought the best way to catch one was to chase it around a hillside. Then have an accomplice chase it the other way. Thus making the Haggis topple over!

"This is not the Puss in Boots I knew and loved as a child."

Superhero leaves his pants behind.

Crystal balls: 'We have three new models to choose from: Scam, Swindle and Extort.'

'It's another corporate lawyer...do we want to buy a soul?'

Bad Children's Book #68 - The Very Hungry Tapeworm.

Bird seed.

'Fetch'

'Give it up Brian. It's a lost cause.'

Too late, Buck remembered his father's advice: 'Never bring a potato to a gun fight.'

Snake leaving bowling alley with bowler and ball.

'Steady Lulu, steady, ...HEEL!' - The Rare Poodle Retriever.

Kitty stoners.

Regifts of the Magi

"I warned you storing eucalyptus leaves in here was not a good idea."

'Senor, I ask ze commandant about your last request, but he say ze salsa lessons are a no-no.'

'Light refreshments now being served'

Animals in Noah's Ark making the skunk walk the plank.

"I told you when you took that horse medicine that there could be serious side effects!"

Unemployed superheroes.

'Sometimes I just feel like some pasta.'

Poke

Event Planner

Chef finds Seal in his pot.

Ball as water-melon.

"Change of plans. You grab the money – I'll bury it."

"When the rubber duck reaches eye level it's a flood. . . wow, brilliant!"

"...And our 'Holiday Scented' candle smells just like credit cards."

'That's the first time I've seen a kneecap slide down a shin!'

"Next time, you climb first!"

'What do you mean I can't check out? What kind of a motel is. . .this. . . place. . .'

Bird trying to feed a bishop's hat.