Quirky Gift Seekers T-Shirts

"The dog ate my magnetic insoles."

'That's a nice gift, Bobby, but I asked for SHIP in a bottle.'

'Joey, I know how fast you are, but this guy's a special problem.'

'I just thought our affair might be a little more...exotic.'

"Every once in a while I go to the sewage treatment plant to get cleaned up."

"Bob bought 500 pounds of noodles, rice and canned meat. . . he survived the corona quarantine but now he's dead of intestinal obstruction..."

'Umlauts...happens every time.'

'No, it's not my diploma. I dropped out. It's my birth certificate.'

Epitaph - 'I'm With Stupid'

But the really great thing about these multifuel stoves is that you can burn almost ANYTHING in them!

'I wanted to be a fighter pilot. But I'm colour blind. What can you do?'

"This was all stolen locally."

The Leaning Tower of Pizza

Captain Pointy No.4 - The terrible Swiss cheese ray

S&M Club: Closed with a Vengeance

'Get me the RAF! Our first helium-filled breast implants have broken their moorings.'

A Better Mouth-Tap

"My master gave me this after he got it off his ankle."

Pawn and Porn Shops.

'Open wider.'

Octopus

"I asked for a bottle of something that would make men drool over me. This is bourbon."

Restroom in the stadium has goal toilet fresheners.

Kamikaze fish. $3.95 each.

"I have a very particular set of skills..."

Easter Island Cheeseheads

"Oi, who are you bleedin' looking at?"

"Wait a minute while I check the rule book."

"The focus groups did say that people like cats...but not in their sandwiches."

Cheshire's Badd Kitty...

Toilet Graduation

Appliances. Air Shampoo $49. The air conditioner won't work properly if you don't shampoo the air first!

Failed laundry detergents

A baby using a heavy duty drill

"And you guys said I was 'gross'."