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Gloria's life had been uneventful - until her 40th birthday, when her arms changed into swans.

The Quack Quack Diaries: Quack Quack Writes A Top Ten Hit

The Awful Lawfuls Chapter 10

'Ignore it! It's just some of the local kids trying to get in for free.'

Thomas Keneally

"Don't forget to rate us on stable-BnB."

'...and when the wolves moved house I was adopted by beetles.'

Meet the author Billy Bovine.

"We understand you wish to report a crime Madam? I'm Inspector La Garde and this is my able assistant Defective Constable Wallis."

"You don't think this could be construed as ironic do you?"

"Your article on the safe storage of combustibles is quite good, but I think you should leave out the part about the wicked witch setting you on fire."

God's Double Whammy.

"It's the super - he says a lot of short American fiction has been clogging the pipes in the basement."

Dragon roasts a chicken impaled on a knight's sword.

'The bartender referred me to a shoe shine boy, and the shoe shine boy referred me to you.'

'Ignore me, it's just my nut allergy.'

News Celeb Divorce: Long-suffering wife tells us of abusive husband, In tomorrow's news - dignified husband tells us of vile grabbing wife.

For several minutes, Norma's body is possessed by the spirit of her dead washing machine,

I knew that guy was bad news.

"Late, as usual."

The Quack Quack Diaries - Quack Quack Gets Possessed

"God I miss the good old days when you could huff and puff anywhere you damn well pleased."

Mikado characters

Mayhem, Inc. Part 16

I was trying to rob e the stagecoach and somehow got signed up for a credit card account!

TV Guide. His majesty King Henry the Eighth want to watch "Queen for a day" --- It's his favorite show!

"Why not have a star-nosed mole guide your sleigh tonight?"

'You cant use the menu like everyone else?'

'He bears keeping an eye on.'

"No, John. You know I'll only end up hurting you."

Anne Enright

Daniel Defoe

"You've got a lot of great books here. Which are your favorite?" "Oh, I like the blue ones."

'You'll never guess who I ran into yesterday!'

'Whilst you were in the toilet, they descended into the underworld.'