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Menu From The Luxury Home of Pancakes

"We have; pulled pork, enticed chicken, persuaded lamb, bullied beef, cajoled Turkey..."

Fast Food Menu Selections

'How is the water prepared?'

'Would you care to see our wine list, water list, soda list, tea list, coffee list, single malt scotch list, or beer list?'

"The Halloween Special is the pork and kraut. It'll come back and haunt you."

"Oh sorry, those are the Ten Commandments. Hang on, I'll get you a menu."

"....and hold the garlic."

Restaurant menu board: 'Day old - 2 day old - 3 day old'

"I can highly recommend the peanut-butter-and-jelly sandwich, served with a chilled glass of milk."

'Which are the most popular and least popular items, and which have been on the menu the longest and shortest times?'

"Our menu never claims that our meat is barbecued. It just says that it's covered in barbecue sauce."

"You get free veggies when you order meatloaf -- We call it the 'peas dividend.'"

'And exactly where did you find the 'antique salami slicer'?'

A la Carte

Pick Your Own Baby Lamb Chops

MKT Diner

'Fish fresh?' 'I don't know I've only been here two weeks .'

"What is this one - 'Two egg surprise'?"

'Yes, we do serve children, but not as meals.'

'That was our first ashtray... we both quite and now we use it as a candy dish.'

'Don't rush me. I'm adding up the calories!'

"The recipe says if you're out of eye of newt you can substitute it with two bat gizzards."

"Chicken's off"

'You just give me a big tip, Madam.'

Today's special - Ox tail soup.

'I'll have a BLT sandwich -- hold the 'B'.'

Teapot

'I'll take a six-piece 'Surprise Me' meal, and two 'Don't Ask, Don't Tell' Wraps with Super Enigma Chunks...'

The Dinner Builiding

"I'm eating for two-for me and the me who is on a diet."