Quirky Knowledge Seekers Gifts

"It's an affliction that can happen to anyone."

'C'mon, Billy, we need another quarter!'

Hay Rides $10

Bar snacks served in bird-feeders.

"That's Brian Eggleston, de facto leader of the playground intelligentsia."

'The secret to life, my friend, is hoppiness!'

'Why, I don't exactly know -- how long HAVE we been here, Bobo?'

Useless information desk at trivia buff convention

Illogic Tree

"And you need to know this why?"

'Don't you have a better escape plan than that?'

"And if all else fails, wave your arms frantically."

"Daddy, instead of the princess story tonight, can you explain how and why manifest destiny eliminated the American Indians?"

'What makes you think you know so much?' - 'Your questions.'

Weapens of Mass Instruction

"Well, you said you wanted something to remove spiders from the bath!"

Let's try something new, Al. I'll say a word, then you remain mercifully silent for the rest of the hour.

COVID tips from Wild Animals

"My great-uncle Octavio always wore his hat in the house. That way, if bad company knocked on the door, he could say he was just leaving."

Cow Pilot.

'Well, it's official. The entire catalogue has to be dumbed down again!'

"OK, who can tell me why it's important to know stuff."

"I can't eat all that."

Movie with dinner: Now serving Texas Chainsaw Casserole.

Community College. History's a lot more fun if you think of it as gossip.

"...and if your friends jumped off a cliff, would you jump off a cliff?"

Pine Hill Hot Dog Water Springs

The Shy Nudist Camp.

Planet of the Ants

'It says here you like to push the envelope.'

"Up here! Beef jerky, trail mix, energy bars!"

Back to School

Psychology: Module 1 . . . . Attention span.

Before the Salivating Dogs

'…and then I invented ‘prong-less' barbed wire…'