Quirky Interview Moments Pillows

Although he had interviewed lots of applicants who were nail-biters, this guy was by far the most annoying.

"Yes, that was very impressive, Mr. Simpkins. But, when we advertised for a keyboard operator... "

"Bob doesn't do well in job interviews, so he hired me. I'm a professional actor who specializes in these situations."

"I see by your resume that you're having trouble finding work because you pad your resume."

'So you have a PhD, big deal, everyone working here has one! The question is, what can you really do?'

'Don't be nervous, relax...he puts his pants on one leg at a time, just like you do. Of course, his pants are tailor made and cost $600 a pair...'

"Seriously?"

'Qualifications aside, Mr Thumb, this is the cutest resume I've ever seen.'

"Ideally, we're looking for someone who can handle change."

"Have you ever used a plastic straw?"

"According to your resume, your last three employers are some of the biggest crime families on the eastern seaboard. I don't know what position you've applied for, but welcome to the company."

"And I suppose my greatest feature is that I don't mind kissing a little booty to get ahead!"

'I worked briefly in a Fine-China shop, but it didn't work out...'

'The part I like best about sex is when I light a cigarette and say next.'

"Have you any OTHER questions apart from home soon you qualify to take sick leave?"

"Thanks, but, uh, I think I'll take the stairs today."

"We don't think you're management material."

'Well, thanks for coming in. We'll get back to you.' The search for Big Foot continues.

'I know you'll fit in well here. It's written all over your face.'

Ted's confidence quickly fades.

'Do you see yourself as a team player?'

"I'll be frank - we offered it to Mario Cuomo first, but he turned it down."

'I'm a hunter, but I've been cross-trained in gatheriing.'

"Congratulations! I think I have just the position for you."

"I see you're of good character."

Knowing that her doctorate in bio-physics made her profoundly overqualified for the job, Susan played dumb during the interview.

"What we're really looking for is a beginner with experience."

'I have all my teeth.'

'You have a dual-personality, sir, and I think we can use both of them.'

'The fact that I've been married six times proves I'm convincing.'

'Since you worked at 'Starbucks', you should be able to brew a decent cup of coffee, you're hired!'

"I see. Very impressive. Now, what would you say are your weaknesses?"

'...Boom-boom-bam, BOOM-boom, boomity-bim-bam, BOOM, bam-bam, BAM, boom-boom....'