Quirky Home Improvers Gifts

'Yes, I do feel safer, but the key sure is a hassle to carry around.'

'I wonder if they have any water filters?'

Dog Hunting Trophies.

Why it's bad when home owners change their minds about the bathroom's location late in a building project.

Tool Box

"Well, he promised you the moon and stars."

Aqua Filter (frog jumping out).

Conservation Area

'What kind of alteration did you have in mind?'

'Ray's as excited as...well...as excited as a guy who just bought a snowblower on the eve of a storm.'

New Coat of Paint at the Sistine Condos

"You pulled most of the muscles in your back lifting your to-do list? You've got a bigger problem than pulled muscles."

'...you said, 'it only gets a bit damp when it rains'!''

'Well, that's fixed that.'

'Now there's a real pro! He can even nail while power napping.'

The Day Dreamer.

Cutaway view of house undergoing renovation

"Oh just ignore him!...he always shows off when we have visitors!"

George is pleased with himself. He replaced the toilet seat without calling a plumber.

'Okay, kids...time for your bath.'

'Don't you think it's time you did something about the draught in here?'

"OK then, I admit it. Installing the log burner was a bad idea!"

Unicyclist painting a ceiling.

'I wasn't to know it's a live shell officer, we've been using it as a door-stop for years!'

'Hello, Robinson Crusoe here, I'd like my kitchen finished by Friday.'

Man's best friend

'It's a coffee-book table.'

"Oh no! This chimney needs re-pointing."

"Oh that, that's my holiday home."

"Our smart home sure is sensitive. Every time I hammer a nail in the wall it screams."

"Okay, I fixed the leaking roof, and I moved the couch over to the far wall, but I'm sorry, I don't unblock toilets!"

'Please excuse the mess. The interior decorators are in.'

"When you get a minute, I have some kitchen shelves you can put up."

'I told you I didn't want to talk about it!'

"I told you you'd made that cat flap too big."