Quirky Cv Curator Gifts

"Interesting CV, we haven't had anyone with a qualification in 'being really good at stuff' before."

Turd - 'It's one of a kind.'

A Snowman using a Pooper-Scooper to pick up his Dog's ice cube Doo Doo

Man looks at huge dinosaur fossil in garden, saying: 'It looks great in the rockery, but don't you think you should call the Natural History Museum?'

Gianni Tatti's Dining-Room Chair

"Bootsy has welcomed the vacuum robot into our home in her own unique way."

"Hi Mom...do you remember in which grade I was given an award for my excellent performance of the song about little ducks?"

"Yes, I suppose attention seeking may be considered by some as an asset, but frankly we need more than that."

'Sounds like someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed.'

'Very impressive, but is there anything you can't do?'

"Their entire planet is coated in things called doodads, tchotchkes, trinkets, knick-knacks, bric-a-brac, and clutter."

'You asked for the 'Cartoonists' Cut'. You got the Cartoonists' Cut'. What's the problem?'

E-commerce for shoplifters.

"Your CV is very impressive. We're interested in the person who wrote it."

'My God, you're right - they are all back issues of TV guide.'

Private View.

"This is one of his early works, from before he was able to throw the paint and actually hit the canvas."

'Well, I am only human!' (Human Resources)

Jeff hadn't quite anticipated how he'd feel exhibiting his art publicly for the first time.

Warning, the Surgeon General warns that prolonged viewing of this product may be hazardous to your health.

"My last job was as a mine interpreter...I would go to a park and describe what the mime was trying to convey."

'Welcome to the interview for our Post-Doc position, I hope you've brought your publication list...'

"I think you wound it too tight."

'I'm sure you are proud of being a world record holder. But having 7,935 different employers in one month isn't something I'd put on my resume.'

'I'm just adding to my collection of figurines.'

'I can't find my mobile, oh, it's next to my ear.'

'I'm not sure if I'm qualified to be sniffy about this one.'

'My resume has a scratch and sniff section.'

Dogs on Pinterest

"A very impressive resume, I confess I didn't realise there was a Nobel prize for 'being the best at computers and all that stuff'."

I'm just sittin ghere updating my resume and recalibrating my expectations.