Quirky Commentary Appreciator Pillows

"Hey, the neighbors just installed a new wifi router."

"You don't know me well enough to not care how I look."

"Sorry lad, ye can't be having' me pot o' toilet paper."

"I'm the bad guy..."

"Touché"

My parents ate New York and all I got was this stupid t-shirt

'I'm not sure which I like best - the fake fire or the fake man with brandy glass in front of it.'

A planet like ours - "Oh no, last time we got romantic, I ended up having to grow a new head."

"I'm a monster."

"Your animal companionship is here!"

Cheesie Rider

God with Earth Controller

"Overkill, dude."

"Oh, I don't do the test myself Sir: Doctor Vampire does it..."

Mummy Shrink.

'I'm just curious, which one of you was dropped off by their boyfriend on a really fast motorcycle?'

Expressions of mystery.

'Mind if I head off a little early today?'

"Curiosity."

Pianist.

"We're making progress."

"My previous patient thought he was a cruise missile."

A cat draws a picture of a sleeping man

"Psychiatric emergency service? Please come fast, I have one here who believes in me!"

"High Fashion"

'A shocking report shows more marriages are ending in divorce than decapitation. Could this be the end of traditional marriage, as we know it? More on that. . .after the break!'

Yeah, I'm standing here alone yelling a bunch of nonsense. If I had a cell phone, you wouldn't bother me!

'I can't tag him, he keeps his watches there.'

'I like it.'

"You're not supposed to answer her when she talks to us."

'It's yet another customer survey asking about our last oil change. Was it poor, fair, very good, blissful or orgasmic?'