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"I think you wound it too tight."

Toadstools

Pirate Squirrels Looking for Buried Treasure

Turd - 'It's one of a kind.'

Piranhaclaus

"And for lot 27 we have another old tennis ball."

Ralph spent his Sundays in the park gathering nuts.

"Consider yourself lucky that you only got a little shaken up in that dryer--socks get lost in that thing and aren't ever seen again.'

Evolution Interrupted By Man Fishing

T-Rex Game of Choice - Ping Pong

Nerdy man wagging his finger.

'No hay, no grooming, no mucking out and they live in the broom cupboard!'

"Elon Musk is buying rope and walnuts."

"Bootsy has welcomed the vacuum robot into our home in her own unique way."

'Oddly, few archaeologist comment on the flossing habits of Easter Island inhabitants.'

Vincent Van Gogh's family reunion Family members with ears missing or bandaged up

Gianni Tatti's Dining-Room Chair

"Oh, great, there are the Cardwells. Bet you they try to talk to us about their levitating cube."

'You did remember the condoms didn't you?'

'According to this, you ate all the pies.'

Fly Hospital: "Just a slight stinging then you'll be fast asleep."

"Queen begins with Q, it should be precisely here."

'Yipee! A cockroach!'

'Noah, before you leave we'd like to have a word with you!'

"But, if I don't peel off the entire label, the label wins."

"I want to see it as art, but I keep asking myself 'is it really grocery?'"

Newton Discovers Surrealism.

'The Algenist meets the Alchemist.'

"It's the kind of trade you get in a twenty-four-hour-a-day joint."

Alien asking for Bernard manning's autograph

A castaway on an island with an old TV that's washed ashore, sees two men in an approaching boat marked, 'TV Licensing'.

'Too dressy?'

If You See Something You Want, Whine!

Crystal Ball Plug