Quirky Cartoon Aficionado Gifts

"Can Jonny come out to panic-buy with us?"

"I wish you wouldn't bring your work home."

"She's fine. She just needs some tofu."

Christmas in the Fish Bowl

"But he had a mask and I thought he was a burglar."

Social Distancing Club

"Do you do much walking?"

Are you the guy who ate my brother?

"Whose the new guy?"

"Greetings, Earthling - Are you a worker or a drone?"

"My dream is to have a little house and a white picket fence wired with explosives."

A Snowman checking out some products for blacken his teeth

'Incidentally, our health insurance has limited eye coverage.'

"Wait! I don't want to be disease resistant!"

Get back in that locker room! Go on - scat! ... Anyone else forget to wash his hands?'

'It's one of the candidates for baptism. Wants to know if he can hold the hand that shook Elvis's hand above the water.'

'I got 397 dead birds and the mayor breathing down my neck. So, is this our perp or just another copycat?'

'Good work Jenkins Whisting the National anthem Genius'

God Bless America, God Help Syria

Cranial-Metal Plate Surgery Centre

"You finished with your peanuts?"

"I think he just ashed on me."

Kidnapping Lord Haw-Haw

"OK, well, if you do hear anything, be sure to give us a call."

'Forget about building trust. Just give the dog a bath.'

'You'll have to install a ramp, sir -- you're discriminating against disabled birds.'

Cow Wash Cycle.

In Which the CEO Takes a Meeting with His Pet Senator

Father Sinead takes confession.... "You did F%!&>$G what, you C%*T!"

'You know what I miss most - hugging!'

'I hope you don't mind, dear — I got my ears pierced.'

Broken since March

"Larry! Swine flu!"

'Oh, I hate when this happens! What do you do when you get a song stuck in your head?'

'Take a picture...it'll last longer.'