Quirky Card Player Gifts

'I'll see you kidney and raise you my liver.'

"Remember when it was 'The Dog and Duck'?"

Golfer to other: 'I've never seen anyone slice a putt before.'

"Steady. This is going to be so sweet."

Karataoke

Fishing for Birds

Peel poker.

'You both know the rules -- walk 1 paces, turn, and tee off on each other.'

Cheating Death.

There's a Facebook group for everyone... "Even Toilet Paper Mummies!"

'Captain, we're going to have to ask you to stop spiking the ball.'

Gopher underground hit by golf tee.

Trainspotters a group of trainspotters outside a church taking down details of a Bride's wedding gown train

Middle Age: When rolling out of bed is easy, but getting up off the floor isn't!

Let the Summer Games Begin!

'You may be a jolly happy soul Frosty, but you stink at poker!'

"I'll trade you my cupcake for your head lice."

'Did you get the hit man Frankie?'

"You have such beautiful eyes."

'Do you have one that plays the theme from Godzilla?'

Who Typexed out the grass?

"You should have said you only wanted a trim. . . I'd have sent you to the barber next door."

'Pointless Passtimes: making dead trees out of recycled wood.'

Fertility Clinic - "Who wants to be mother?"

Stock Market Psychology: 'Buy with the leftside of your brain, sell with the rightside!'

Llama training

Cards Blind Dating Game

Gracie's Halloween Candy Exchange.

Valentines for Things

"I think we need to be more careful not to over-schedule appointments."

Man sees sign on betting shop door listing odds on when the proprietor will come back from lunch.

"Cheater!"

"That's a nasty cavity. That is why it is so important to brush your hair."

'The only thing I don't like about playing solitaire on the computer is you can't peek under the cards.'

'Relax Mrs Flanagan, I've never known a high fibre exorcism to fail yet!'