Quirky Award Collector Pillows

"Call me if it gets any bigger"

"We found the poor thing stranded on the beach last summer and decided to adopt it."

Larry's used art

Seagiraffes

"Don't worry about your purchase not working. Everything we sell here is totally non-functional."

'The ghost walks this passage every night Monday to Friday. He has weekends off.'

"Will you have a Sphinx?"

(Camel paintings)

"I warned you not to use that club...now look, you struck oil!"

Romantic Giraffes

Dracula in a Vampire Hospital getting some extra blood from a Human blood drip

"Sorry. I just find rotating my head helps me to relax during the test."

Turd - 'It's one of a kind.'

Cut out and keep your own Christmas Caterer.

Duck Hunt

Raincloud Umbrella

Cheeze Wiz.

Thinks he's too cool for school.

Early cyborg.

"We're odd looking but just as good."

"I don't know about you, but it always makes me feel kinda special."

Best before 65 million BC.

"Trust me, this is as weird for me as it is for you."

'I got this one for thinking outside the box.'

A man walks his dog wearing a cone.

'Powdery stuff? Oh, that's egg substitute, from the Vegan lobby.'

"Wait, you're firing me?! But I was Time magazine’s Person of the Year!"

"Oh, I'm thrilled with my new dog! He's sort of a hunter/retriever/plumber/electrician."

Ice shelfie.

Cat Show

"Dear? The toothpaste is on the top shelf. Don't touch the tube on the bottom shelf, that's Grandma's triple strength epoxy denture adhesive."

"I don't think our smart home likes the color we painted it. It keeps spitting it out."

The Beer Garden of Eden: "This hard cider is life-changing. Try a sip."

"Now, why didn't I think of that?"

'Anorak anoraks'.