Quirky Accommodation Seeker Gifts

Edna's Couch and Breakfast.

'No, Janet, there is no mini-bar--but we do have mini-baccarat.'

Lumbar support animal

Picks your own strawberries....Strangle your own turkeys

"Not to mention the park view."

Mayhem, Inc. Part 15

Newton's vacation

'Bed & Bagel'

'A lab had me smoking cigarettes for months. I'm living off my disability payments. You?'

English Summer: Man in a tanning bed on the beach in the middle of a storm.

"Did you pack your own bags?"

'Does it bother you that I use wadded tissues as pillows?'

'If you're coming on this road trip the sign stays'

"As the owner of a hotel chain, I found being shipwrecked quite a challenge."

Nude Beach/Perv Bluff

A sign hangs from the front of the Sunnyvale Nudist Camp - 'Join Today - 100% Off!'

"I should've known better than to AirBNB from a bird."

'I'd like to time my vacation to when my mate is in heat.'

'We only have rooms with real teeth left!'

"Let's see - you might be just right for a little 2-turret, 1 1/2 moat unit I'm renting on West 58th street."

'Is there an empty apartment I can use for cultural events?'

"Can I suggest a hoarder's house? It's perfect for a young family of rats to move in and share with the current owner..."

"There's a gender neutral toilet under the bed."

An elderly couple arrive at Kiddie Pool Buffet, where people are wearing swim suits etc. and serving food from the pool itself.

"Very nice, but what's the thread count?"

'SHOP!!!'

"Is it right on the lagoon?"

"... Yes, I know there's a hole in your ceiling. Why do you think we're called, the star view motel?"

'Who would like a little judo chop while you're waiting?'

Asian Travel: 'Absolutely do NOT book anyplace without a western toilet!'

'Hard left, Doctor-hard left! Don't go and land it in 2020!

'And as the sun sets over the hills.'

'I gave the Captain a thousand bucks to strand us on an uninhabited island with nothing but a musket.'

George wanted the cheapest holiday he could find...

Fleas Planning A Getaway