Queen Of Spades Gifts

'Is the pilot an Ace?'

Looks like another day in which. . . I have to run the world, the country, the business and the household!!!

The Three Wise Queens

"Bed Spread"

Balancing work and family

"I had to skip my workout."

"'Conquer Spain'? 'Balance the budget'? 'Reform the justice system'? -- You call this a honey-do list?"

If Dr. Chan has a schoolteacher husband, a diabetic mother-in-law, twins in preschool, and a daughter who stays with her father across town on alternate weekends, and one twin and the daughter have colds, how many free rapid COVID tests are required to alleviate Dr. Chan's breaking-point levels of despair?

Lady Macbeth

Clubbing

Cut out and keep your own Gardener!

The Royal Wii

"Of all the labour saving devices invented in the last 70 years, this is one's favourite."

'I cut myself slashing the budget!'

Everybody forgot his jubilee.

Digging.

A war would have been bad enough, but losing Alsace-Lorraine in a poker game?

'Could you scoot your chair over this way a little dear?'

Cat with Crown.

'Well, sure, two pair is nice but nothing beats five singles!'

"...But if you'd led back a heart instead of that spade..."

"The kids - Prince Englebert and Princess Felicia - would like us to move into the olde monarchs' home."

'I wish you wouldn't bring work home with you!'

'Well, you DID know this job was dangerous when you took it.'

'Let it go, will you? -- That whoopie cushion incident was years ago!'

"What never fails to anger me is that I'm always identified by my man."

'Oh, that's your Grandpa -- I couldn't bring myself to cut his head off.'

'You're just lazy! -- Don't give me that 'metal fatigue' stuff!'

POLLS, 'If an election were being held today....'

'Your mommy is here as you requested, sire, to check for monsters under your throne!'

'Every time I win an argument, he goes off on a Crusade to sulk.'

'Son, isn't it about time you went out and conquered a country of your own?'

'I'm letting it lie fallow this year.'

'Do you smell something burning?'

"And then at 3 you have a meeting with the royal pain in the butt."