Quarter Pounder Aficionados Pillows

"Okay, who hasn’t eaten a McDonald’s burger in the past two days?"

'I don't like heights...maybe that's why I've had so many low points in my life.'

'But he's supposed to tell everyone how much you weigh! '

A martial arts student saws a block of wood in half

"Don't hit him too hard, his little old mum's at the ringside!"

"Can you identify the person who assaulted you and then stole your title?"

Nun fight at the OK Corral.

Ballerina Boxer,"She's going for a win on pointes."

Boxing Snowmen.

"Try a new tactic, punch back."

Attorney Punching Bag

The pop-up book of fighters

"I'm married to a control freak!"

Her Poo-Fu is strong!

". . . and in the corner to my right, weighing 217 pounds, fighting as a Capricorn with Capricorn rising and Mars conjunct Uranus in the fifth, out of Beaufort, South Carolinaaa. . ."

"The hardest thing about winning bouts? The other guy's fists."

'In this corner for tonight's 'Out-Of-Court Settlement' bout ...!'

Heenan Sayers Fight- Heenan's New Training base, J Pocock's Farm near Bath

Tourism invites money (drawbridge with pound sign).

'Promise me. Never again. Don't ever get sheared right before a fight.'

'I've gone over the fight tapes and I think I've pinpointed your weakness.'

Post office - Even Pension Day was the same. Dorian, was always asked to produce his birth certificate.

'Your opponent only hit you once - the ref hit you at least a dozen times...'

New Olympic Event: Tibetan Boxing.

"Ok, that kind of spotting. No. I'm not doing that."

The knockout

'Not cremated exactly, but barbecued would be okay.'

Don Quixote in the Hamptons

"Let's have a clean fight and no hitting below the belt."

"Look! I got this gold candy medallion at the opening of the ALi center! Muhammad Ali is my hero!" "Then you should chuck that medallion in the Ohio river and burn a draft card, Junior!"

'He looks mean. Avoid eye contact.'

'How was I to know she was into martial arts?'

Although a vastly inferior boxer, Ross 'Tiny Head' Watson once again avoids the knockout and fights to a draw.