Quackery Skeptics Pillows

Chiroquacktic school

"They must be grown-up ducks, because they're eating the crusts too."

'Goodness, no Doctor, my husband is not calling you any insulting names. He's a duck and that's the only word he knows.'

'In my time, we didn't talk to a blackberry. We just ate the damn things!'

"You don't need a duck call. I can just download this Find-a-Fowl app."

"David live a rich, full life, despite what his Wikipedia page says."

Inflatable Duck Boat

"I'd like to see you do this online."

'And this is Eddy, he's been giving virtual tours long before computers.'

Coffee. The phrase "where everybody knows your name" used to sound warm and friendly. Now, with all our personal information exposed online, it sounds scary!

'My daughter read on the internet about a hip replacement with free built-in MP3 player,'

'That's a quack-quack'. Ornithological conference.

Down With Wikipedia

The anti-social network: 'Hey Jeffrey...I need help setting up my dad's anti-social network.'

"Well, you can't say they didn't warn us."

"Gramps, you were alive before everyone knew what you were doing on social media... What was that called?" "Bliss!"

"...And those are some of the books I would have read if the Internet had never been invented."

"Whatever happened to throwing Frisbees around?"

"Well, who you gonna believe? Me or Wikipedia?"

"When I was a kid there was no internet. If you wanted to bully someone, you had to do it to their face."

"And more intriguingly, your prognosis differs depending on which search engine I use."

"Of course you couldn't be replaced by an app. It would take at least two."

'Well you certainly walk like a duck and quack like a duck.'

Fresh Eggs: Now With Free How To Suck Eggs Download!

"I see that you're very concerned about the rise of AI technology."

"The 'Age of the Computer'? We get a pencil on a piece of string!"

"No, as of yet, they are not on the internet!"

"Hmmm. I'm gonna have to Google this."

"There's no such thing as 'just' ducky."

Veterinary Clinic. No, it's not a "wading" room.

I've traveled back through time to warn: The aliens are here. Open Mike Night Presents Future Guy. They hitched rides in on Halley's Comet every time it's near. Living nanites masquerading as technology … depending on the gullibility of you and me. 200,000 years of riding horses and buggies ... and suddenly we're 3-D printing tools and cars and trees? They're everywhere, just biding time to finish their big plan. They're in your phones, your watch, your cars, and they are nearly done. The brain

Be sure to tell us if the school tries cyberspying again. Ok, mom. It's wrong to snap webcam pics of students. Uh-huh. They shouldn't use computers that way! Besides, it's a waste of time. They could just check the kid's facebook page, What were they thinking?

'If you don't believe me, Google it.'

"Anything with amazon, I hear they treat their workforce like robots."