Internet Skeptics Pillows

Help. Forgot All My Account Passwords.

Fish follows after the caveman who caught him.

"The internet says I have an eating disorder, I might be anorexic!"

'getlost@youloser.com is that your real email address?'

Down With Wikipedia

"My granddaughter's first words to me were 'OK, Boomer.' I have no idea what that even means."

My Bookshelf Before the Internet

"I need a deeper access to his brain. Only google has the records."

Rare Books

'Sure, a drawing on Facebook has coverage, but nothing wows the family like a spread on the fridge.'

I.T. Fear

"That recruitment algorithm we’ve been using, I think we need to revisit it!"

March Against Big Tech: "Oh, wow, this has bee great for my step count!"

'Tech stocks dropped on the finding that technology isn't neccessarily the best solution to everything.'

Lies/Damned Lies/Social Media

"And may I now introduce Professor Muckenspucker, who is an authority on artificial stupidity."

"Of course, if they ever start to suspect all their TVs are watching them back, we may have problems."

'I'm old enough to remember when smiley faces were right side up.'

Computer Class.

The fate that awaits us all: creeping Rooneyism

'Never trust emails. You can't shred them.'

"Can't we have 'PRESS BUTTON' to shut up the commentator's gobbledegook."

"No annual raises, but I will 'like' all your hard work on Facebook."

"I'd like to see you do this online."

'And this is Eddy, he's been giving virtual tours long before computers.'

GPS can still have a few bugs in the system.

'The doctors say I have a rare illness that turns people into birds - it's untweetable.'

"Turn on the news." "I will not comply." "My analysis of your viewing patterns has determined you will grow depressed after the lead story." "There is a 95% probability you will then gorge yourself on rocky road ice cream and then stay up all night googling elliptical machines and diet pills." "Who told you this?" "Both your refrigerator and your browser are gossipy."

Privacy

"We need to rethink our strategy of hoping the Internet will just go away."

How Grandma Sees the Remote