Quackery Critic Pillows

"You've been fooling around with alternative medicines, haven't you?"

Guy hanging in dungeon to other: 'Are you sure this chiropractor is licensed?'

Nancy's Yerberia - We cure colds - good luck pills - no more back pain!

'Goodness, no Doctor, my husband is not calling you any insulting names. He's a duck and that's the only word he knows.'

Sign: 'Welcome to Fernbanks. Beneath our quaint Norman Rockwell-ish exterior beats a big-box chain store heart, ready to sell out at the drop of a hat.'

"Elementary, my dear Quackson."

"You don't need a duck call. I can just download this Find-a-Fowl app."

Inflatable Duck Boat

'Save your money - he's a quack.'

'My dentist recommended it.'

'That's a quack-quack'. Ornithological conference.

"She thought he was a good listener. Turns out he was a decoy."

"It's all good – but some of it is better."

So what's your back story? What do you do? Marketing. Downtown. House of Java.net Cybercafe. I'm an investor in The Infant Restaurant Critic. Heard of it? A baby goes to a restaurants and cafes and tried their food. If he likes it, the eatery gets a glowing online review. If not, curtains! I'm an investor. I'm on the ground floor! Did you only ask about me so you could then talk about yourself? I hear you. You're asking about me. Don't know what's worse: Men, high-tech investors, or the combinat

'Well you certainly walk like a duck and quack like a duck.'

"There's no such thing as 'just' ducky."

Veterinary Clinic. No, it's not a "wading" room.

'OK, now I'm freaked out. How'd he get my cell phone number?'

The Quack Quack Diaries: Quack Quack Rocks The Vote

"It's okay, I'm actually just a flamboyantly-costumed osteopath."

"I haven't slept well since you pointed out that these modeling sessions are a form of betrayal."

'Tell me. How many acupuncture treatments did doctor Wing give you?'

Lead Duck With Evil Plans

'Hang on! A good looking she-duck alone on lake doesn't seem right to me: It must be a decoy...'

'As you may know, I'll retire in a few weeks but you better not think that I'm a lame duck now!'

'I want some lessons in back seat driving.'

Ed's 1 second acupuncture treatment (man holding porcupine).

New-Age junk diet.

'i thought I'd held him get rid of his chronic depression . . .'

No shoes, No shirt, No Service.

If symptoms persist sue your doctor.

Social comment on the time-honoured tradition of attaching a Just Married sign to the newlyweds car

"Please don't call me names because you're feeling down in the mouth."

Dead ducks