Purgatory Ponderer Gifts

Small-Talk Limbo

Hand baskets only lane in hell.

'At least I'm getting a nice, even tan.'

'Just ask yourself -- Are you better off now than you were two thousand years ago?'

'Yak, yak, yak.'

'He's the best sheepdog I ever had.'

"Go ahead. Fly through it. I dare you."

'He's the best bull I've ever had.'

"If He didn't want us to eat it, why'd He wrap the whole thing in bacon?"

'White meat or dark?'

'Naughty? Nice? Santa, I don't deal in absolutes.'

...Well I've got to make sure I REALLY like where I am.

Lost and Profound.

"Well, Mom, I guess you saw what happened."

"Well, it certainly explains why everyone's so nice!"

"He keeps watching over our flock. I think it's a stalker."

'I never tire of watching Hippies go by: They're so colourful...'

'Do you ever wonder about this whole 'money' thing?'

"The summer people are coming! The summer people are coming!"

'I should know who he is! His work is in every gallery I go into.'

'The mind-body problem is best expressed in the formulation...OOf!'

Decisions: Yes or No, 'Or maybe?'

A tree falls in a forest and no one is there to hear it.

"Your grass looks great."

Green Pieces Four Leaf Clover

'I think things went wrong for me in the fifth round.' 'In hindsight, was that a good time to begin meditating?'

Bloomin' moths!

"Up here, we call it 'Nectar of the Gods' not 'Devil's Brew'!"

I have these recurring dreams that I'm completely naked in a field!

Is there life after digestion?

Erm...what the hell is cud, anyway?

Jim's Mowing Services

Will work for grass

"Yes, the grass is greener on the other side, but significantly sparser too, so it's a toss-up really...."

Hmmm... what's my real purpose? Why am I here? - 'Ooh! Ooh! Me! Me! Let me guess!' - 'Go on, then.' - 'Is your life a homage mediocrity?' - 'Ouch.' - 'Quizzes are fun! Ask me more!' -