Puppy Tester Gifts

'I'll take him.'

"Pick me!"

"I have your gender reveal results. Boy, girl, boy, boy, girl, girl, boy, girl, boy, boy..."

"There's really not much to obedience school. Just listen up and do what they say."

"Watch out, Simone's hangry - her stomach AND her throat are growling."

"For the sake of not being redundant, your honor, I feel that one 'bad dog' is sufficient."

"You can't plead cute."

"Pssst. Fake poop."

Walking the dog - 'surprise'!

"C'mon, you can do this! Be the sock!"

Marv was trying to teach Rufus how to be a REAL retriever.

'Sit, Rollover, Heel'

"Are you happy with your current ball?"

"Sorry kid, I work alone."

'He followed me home. Can I keep him?'

"And always remember...If you're going to be sick, always do it on the carpet. It's more absorbent."

Talking Dog.

'You can come out, Marmaduke. I was just kidding about putting lipstick on you.'

Balloon dog training

"Can you teach me to really bark? I only seem to be able to yap..."

"Honey! He's breached the recliner! I repeat, the puppy has breached my La-Z-Boy!!"

Dogs Bring Slippers.

"In obedience school, I was voted 'Most likely to chew a slipper'."

'I understand you don't have a resume but you do have your pedigree papers?'

'He's a son-of-a-bitch but he's our son-of-a-bitch!'

"Invisible fences, voiced activated pet doors, automatic pet dispensers, how's an old dog supposed to keep up with all this new technology."

Cookie Thief

'Okay, okay. On second thought, maybe going on a diet isn't necessary.'

He Did It!

'Forget about your pride Son: We're expected to beg...'

'Fallllling in heeeeeat agaaaaain

"I'm running late for totally dignified reasons."

Thanks to the kitty-cam, curiosity no longer kills the cat.

"Did you or did you not perform the fake ball toss on my client, causing irreparable humiliation?"

What they're thinking.