Puppy Panic Survivor Gifts

'I told you we weren't pet people.'

"Sometimes ... I just want to run away."

'Boy, watch out for that pursestring suture!'

''I couldn't wait any longer.''

"C'mon, you can do this! Be the sock!"

Walking the dog - 'surprise'!

'Sit, Rollover, Heel'

"And always remember...If you're going to be sick, always do it on the carpet. It's more absorbent."

"You are going to have lots of puppies."

'You can come out, Marmaduke. I was just kidding about putting lipstick on you.'

"Oh, stop hyperventilating! You went on vacation to relax, remember?"

"I guess people want dogs with no problems. Lucky for me, all I've got is quirks."

"In obedience school, I was voted 'Most likely to chew a slipper'."

"I know I said, 'If there's anything I can do,' but I draw the line on licking your incision for you."

"He's obedient as long as my requests align with his internal moral imperatives."

'Okay, okay. On second thought, maybe going on a diet isn't necessary.'

He Did It!

Cookie Thief

'I don't know what it is, doc. I think I'm having a nervous breakdown.'

"Did you or did you not perform the fake ball toss on my client, causing irreparable humiliation?"

Dog next to sign that says, 'Beware of Dog's Feelings'.

"Stop coding the dog, Fred! He should have to bury his bones himself!"

"It was humiliating! First, he told me to beg and then he wanted me to roll over and pretend I was dead...so, I bit him!"

'To cure your dog I suggest you change your aftershave lotion, Mr Lutshbuddle.'

'You're allowed up on the couch.'

Hang Time Fido

"Yes, you're definitely a good boy. Your only fault may be that you care too much."

"Yes, I'm talking to you. I believe you're the only Sparky in the house."

'It's only a checkup!'

"Fill out the form and have a seat in the waaait... waaait... waiting room."

"I'm sure this is an interesting story."