Pup Punster Gifts

"I'm new here. How much do we leave for a tip?"

Contrary to popular belief, the road to Hell is paved with a comprehensive, lifetime tax return.

Dogs life

'Iguana know what time it is.'

Litterary Dogs.

Dog Walker

"Only 150 kids? - Have you considered fertility treatment?"

Should I bark? Flow chart for dogs

"Damn! Someone just asked for chicken drumsticks."

'This is taking too long - we'll have to induce hatching.'

'We are gathered here...'

Public toiletsbathrooms for dogs using fire hydrants in cubicals.

"Actually, There's a lot less pressure since I've gone from his best friend to his therapy dog."

"Mum, what is a nugget?"

Chicken Funeral Planning.

"Hallelujah!"

'Hopefully this will not have a negative impact on my dinner.'

A dog reads a newspaper

"I'm afraid there will be more cuts."

"Cooky was askin' about you again."

The Poodle and The Twooudle.

"Is that one of those brandy dogs?"

'Ah look, what a lovely tortoise shell cat.'

"The body is eighty-two-per-cent broth."

'If you want to improve your golf score, the best wood to use is a pencil with an eraser.'

'Nice try, Billy, but dogma is not a puppy's mother!'

'And stop making that stupid clucking sound'

'Well Mrs. Henson, form the looks of this place, egg stacking, children claw marks, chicken blood graffiti, egg splat everywhere, I'd have to say this is the work of a poultry geist!'

Brenda lost not only the egg toss, but something much, much more.

'That's Princess... formerly 'Prince'.'

'We don't have pressed duck, but we could shove around a chicken for you.'

His Other Shtick

"Be honest Walter...Is it me you really love or just the farm-fresh eggs every morning?"