Punny Professor Gifts

"...then - and here's the funny part - I add the potassium sulfate..."

"Do you want to play doctorate?"

Clown teaches how to speak Jibberish

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: The Science of Love

"Okay, that's enough Physics for one day. Take a break and chase your tails."

The theory that ‘Time is Relative' came to the professor during a Decelerated Math Class.

'Home Schooling'

'Hey Winston, this is my dad. He's obsessed with sitting.'

Subatomic particles

'Can you just send the digital copy?'

'Going to Puppy School is so old fashioned Dad: I can do the course through open learning now...'

"Professor Zlata! You're just in time to be the planet Neptune!"

"Do you have any bedtime stories that aren't about the former Yugoslavia?"

'Dad demonstrates for an hour and then we go home - what happens in your swimming lessons?'

Planting vegetables - "BEAN there done that."

Benjamin Franklin

'I was tired of my goaty, so I decided to grow a moustache...'

'Think Basics.'

'Well, I guess a master's degree is a master's degree, even if it is in skateboarding.'

"I give all new teachers the same advice. First you have to get the attention of the class. Can you quack like a duck or juggle two books in the air?"

'Today's lesson - how to slam a door.'

'I'm sorry, Professor Johnson is not picking up. I can put you through to the equally eccentric Professor Williams if you would like?'

Professors Elliot, Lars, and Roth while away the hours till the new semester begins.

"Waiter! - will my pizza be long?"

'Do you have to explain nutrition with a pie chart?'

The institute.

"The big boot Italy ain't gonna kick the small shoe Sicily no more, capiche?"

"Honey, I just got 't-boned' off I-80 West of Omaha!"

There were occasional moments when she questioned her decision to work with truly gifted students.

"He's surprisingly good at small talk."

'Sir, one question... When will we know if we've run-out of invisible ink?'

'They canceled school today -- the teacher couldn't find her hand puppets.'

"My math teacher says I should consider becoming a teacher some day."