Punny Poets Gifts

'Nothing from the Nobel Committee or the National Endowment for the Arts, but you have a tentative offer from Burma-Shave.

Passed over at the Inaugural Poetry Audition

"I see you also took the road less travelled!"

"There's only the four of us. I hope you like doo-wop."

Mystery of the Poets

Intellectual Foreplay...

Happy Hog - Manet

Rebel without a cause. Poet without a war.

Jump-Rope Rhymes For Adults

Planting vegetables - "BEAN there done that."

That night, Neil Thomas declared himself the poet laureate of 1973 Sheffield Lane.

Signs reads 'Do Not Feed the Boids.'

"Norman is an island."

"You're a gifted writer, although at times you're just too precious."

Stud Finders: 'These don't even work!'

"Waiter! - will my pizza be long?"

"...then - and here's the funny part - I add the potassium sulfate..."

"Honey, I just got 't-boned' off I-80 West of Omaha!"

Man in the stocks on his typewriter.

Valentines for Things

"Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, all we ask for Mr. Whitman is poetic justice."

'I just had to come over...You caught my eye.'

'I'm going to need a Margin of Error or I can't publish your prediction of 6 more weeks of winter.'

'So, Harkness, I see that you have a very checkered background!'

"Do you remember what you had for lunch last Thursday?"

"Hey, look on the bright side, at least we're not wine coolers."

'Inner-city kids in search of a butter life.'

This year I thought I'd do something different and give up writing Haiku poetry!

"May I write a poem about you?"

'That large, rolled up newspaper is a reminder - mess up this office, and you'll pay the price.'

'I think I just invented 'Rock 'n Roll'.'

'Do you like Indian food?' 'I have my reservations!'

Fish in gaol.

"Deadly gas is escaping from Uranus!"

Ask not from whom the bum begs. He begs from thee. ?