Punning Foodie Gifts

"‘Extra vile old ox’? No, sir – it stands for ‘extra virgin olive oil.’"

Wife: 'Ah, honey.....why are you covered in raw fish and rice?' Husband: 'Oh I was running late for the 6:15 and got on a darn sush train by mistake!'

'But Mom, I like potatoes in their jackets.'

"I forgot to take a pic of the tacos."

"No thanks, I'm stuffed."

"That’s a toaster. It’s a tanning bed for bread."

'You're supposed to just lick the cone!'

Do-it-yourself sushi bar serves live fish to customer.

"Beans, Them Beans, Them Beans, Beans, Beans..."

"I'm not trying to freak you out, but your eel roll is moving."

"Damn! Someone just asked for chicken drumsticks."

'All right, so you've prepared your resignation . . . let me have it!'

"A little lamb please."

"This IS a chicken fried steak!"

"Hi, Honey. For dinner we're having Shis Kabob."

Val and Les could see a fork in the road but they weren't expecting a dip.

"Okay,let's go through this one more time. I asked for a LEMON in my water, not a LEMMING."

Revenge is a dish best served cold.

Doughnut Criminals

Beef Wellingtons

I knew from the starch we were a perfect mash.

Onion Guillotine

Pickled beets.

"I'm going to start with the antipasta."

(Omi God! Pigs in a blanket!)

"So this bacon in my ear - d'you think it can be cured..?"

"I like a diet rich in surfers."

"Guac-A-Mole"

"Are you sure this is the Irish guacamole?"

"Nothing to worry about. A nuggetectomy is a very simple procedure."

The Chef's dumplings were his speciality.