Punctuality Critic Pillows

'You're late for our meeting again'

Karen decided this would be the last time she ever dated a plumber...

Late BroomStick

"Sorry I'm late. I overslept." "Is that even a real word?"

"You keep impeccable time."

Excess Baggage: When you are on a cruise and they say the ship leaves at 5:30, they really mean the ship leaves at 5:30.

"I'll be a bit late... sorry."

The Vicar 's Invitation to Dinner.

Man looking at watch while a cuckoo comes out of his head

'Am I the first one here?'

"Always faithful to arrive early and, of course, get the dibs on the jelly doughnuts."

"I'm tardy? Whew! I was afraid I was going to be late for school!"

"We were running late, so my mom faxed me to school."

Time Clock

'Sorry I'm late - I couldn't stop doing things with it!'

Low self esteem workshop - 'You missed it. It finished two hours ago, you useless pillock.'

Your talk of promptness seems to have worked - everybody was out of here by one minute after five.

'He's a real stickler for punctuality. He got really annoyed when I was late for an appointment, next week.'

'Any chance of getting your alarm clock fixed?

"Sorry we’re late, but apparently the journey of 1,000 miles begins with 'I know a shortcut around this traffic'."

'Here he comes in his jimjams - cutting it fine with out breakfast today!'

'Sir, that efficiency expert you hired called -- he said he'll be five hours late.

The inventor of the clock realizes his mistake

'Sorry I'm late.'

'Time manager'

"Sorry! Traffic was awful and also I left really late."

Big Ben

"So we`re going out and you haven`t even bothered to change?"

"Help! Set me free!"

"You're so consistently late that you're pretty much doing my job and docking your own hours."

'I'm not late. Everyone learns at their own speed.'

Internal Clocks.

'Anyone can get to school on time if he tries hard enough, Eddie.'

If you should be in this meeting, but are reading this instead - you're fired!

Husband concerned about being late whilst wife has plastic surgery.